How I Lived Without My Mommy For 14 Years

I remember the day my Mommy, Iris Mebane Phillips, passed away. I was beyond hurt. I was crushed. I was depressed. I didn’t want to live life. I suffered from heartache for many years. I cried and I cried some more.

But…enough of that! This isn’t a post that will make you cry. But I hope it’s one that will bring peace to your heart and a smile on your face. Because today I am rejoicing and loving the life I’m living. And this life is because “she left a prayer” for me.

What prayer?

I remember my Mommy always being a praying woman. She prayed about everything. She consulted God in everything. This is one of the reasons I’m a strong believer in prayer today. But, my Mommy prayed for me. And I remember my Dad telling me it was before I was born. It started off in the womb. They both laid hands on her belly and prayed over my life. This was the beginning. But not the prayer I want to focus on today. I want to focus on the prayer she left here for me when she left this earth at the age of 56. The year 2005. This prayer keeps me. This prayer holds me. This prayer lifts me. This prayer comforts me. This prayer watches over me. This prayer put women in place that would help me live this wonderful journey called life.

As I was in prayer on 12/25/2018, the prayer came to my heart. I don’t know the exact words of the prayer, but the Holy Spirit revealed to me that she prayed for me. Her prayer included me being surrounded by great women of God that are powerful and who will keep me lifted in prayer. That can give me wisdom. This prayer included me being in the hands of women who I trust and love and could honor them as my very own. This prayer included women who would adore me and and adopt me into their families as their own. This prayer included me walking as a giant in ministry. This prayer covers me and lives through the women who God placed in my life to love me.

Who are these women? (No particular order)

Carla T. West- Mother

Pastor Gwen Bowen- Mama

Pastor Marlena Daggs- Spiritual Mother

Rev. Verona Chin- Mom

Prophetess Annie Howard- God Mother

As I sat down in prayer on 12/25/2018, these women came to mind. Each of them hold a special place in my heart. Each of them pray for me daily. Each of them offer me wisdom and guidance. Each of them were placed in my life because of my Mommy. They are apart of the prayer left for me.

So, how have I lived without my Mommy for 14 years? I haven’t. She’s with me everyday. I see her through my actions, smile, or speech. I see her in my ministry. I hear her whisper “Jess-Jess” and “Pookie Pie”. And lastly, I see her through these 5 women who are in my life because she needed to make sure I was raised and given that motherly love since she wouldn’t be here to do it herself.

Mommy. Iris. My angel. My everything…I honor you today and forever. I will continue to live in Christ and represent the kingdom. I will continue to move in God. I will continue to carry the mantle you left in my hands, for His glory. I LOVE YOU!!

Thank you for being a praying woman! ❤️

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, MOMMY!!!!!

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Are you strong and courageous?

Are you being strong and courageous or are you being weary and unstable? This was a question for me first. I had to answer it when God brought me to Joshua 1:18. As I read, I realized that in my disobedience I am dying and those I’m destined to reach will die. Because God placed me strategically among people to bring deliverance and healing. And He’s done the same for you. So when we are being weary and unstable, the enemy is coaching us to stay as such. Why? Because if you are discouraged, you won’t walk strongly and courageous after the things God needs you to do. His will MUST be done in you. And not just for your sake, but for the souls you are destined to touch. No pressure. Because aren’t we just doing what God called us to do? So don’t be weary. Be strong. Be courageous. Be who God called you to be in Him.


“Whoever rebels against your word and does not obey it, whatever you may command them, will be put to death. Only be strong and courageous!””

‭‭Joshua‬ ‭1:18‬ ‭NIV‬‬

❤️

What a great reminder-Proverbs 3:1-10

What I was reminded of is pretty simple. As I read through Proverbs 3:1-10, I’m reminded that my faithfulness and obedience to Gods Word and His Kingdom will produce promises. When I obey His commands, I attach myself to long life, peace, and prosperity. Who doesn’t desire these things? So you mean to tell me, they automatically attach themselves to me when I obey God?! That’s an extremely fair trade off. You mean to tell me that trusting God will put me on a straight path? I don’t need to try to figure out my life because God’s promise to give me straight paths will set my life up for greatness?! Yeah, with promises like that from a God who is able to perform awesome wonders, I’ll stay on the road of obedience for life. It’s well worth it. Don’t you think so too ? So keep the faith. You’re right where God needs you. Stay faithful and obedient to His Word.


“My son, do not forget my teaching, but keep my commands in your heart, for they will prolong your life many years and bring you peace and prosperity. Let love and faithfulness never leave you; bind them around your neck, write them on the tablet of your heart. Then you will win favor and a good name in the sight of God and man. Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight. Do not be wise in your own eyes; fear the Lord and shun evil. This will bring health to your body and nourishment to your bones. Honor the Lord with your wealth, with the firstfruits of all your crops; then your barns will be filled to overflowing, and your vats will brim over with new wine.”

‭‭Proverbs‬ ‭3:1-10‬ ‭NIV‬‬

❤️

Help

I hear you screaming.

I see you reaching.

I feel your heart.

I am here.

Me. God.

I am here and I hear.

I am your ever present help.

I will never leave you nor forsake you.

Come to me ALL who are weary and heavy laden and I will give you rest.

I am your comfort.

I am your peace.

I am your healer.

I am your help.

I am your strength.

I am your joy.

Remember, call to Me.

I will answer.

I will bring you out.

I will deliver.

Look to Me.

I hear you screaming.

I see you reaching.

I feel your heart.


“I will lift up mine eyes unto the hills, from whence cometh my help. My help cometh from the Lord, which made heaven and earth. He will not suffer thy foot to be moved: he that keepeth thee will not slumber. Behold, he that keepeth Israel shall neither slumber nor sleep. The Lord is thy keeper: the Lord is thy shade upon thy right hand. The sun shall not smite thee by day, nor the moon by night. The Lord shall preserve thee from all evil: he shall preserve thy soul. The Lord shall preserve thy going out and thy coming in from this time forth, and even for evermore.”

‭‭Psalms‬ ‭121:1-8‬ ‭KJV‬‬

“Come unto me, all ye that labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn of me; for I am meek and lowly in heart: and ye shall find rest unto your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.”

‭‭Matthew‬ ‭11:28-30‬ ‭KJV‬‬

“God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble.”

‭‭Psalms‬ ‭46:1‬ ‭KJV‬‬

“Let your conversation be without covetousness; and be content with such things as ye have: for he hath said, I will never leave thee, nor forsake thee. So that we may boldly say, The Lord is my helper, and I will not fear what man shall do unto me.”

‭‭Hebrews‬ ‭13:5-6‬ ‭KJV‬‬

❤️

Living righteously

Living righteously allows us to walk in protection, provision, authority, life, diligently, abundantly, in freedom, joyfully, fruitfully, progressively, with strength, with patience, and with endurance. We long to hear the voice of God throughout our days. But the wicked do not seek to hear His voice or correction. The wicked walk according to flesh and fulfilling the lusts of flesh. The outcome is death. Living in correction brings honor. God brings correction to those He loves. He loves us enough to save us from the trap of death. So let us listen to the voice of God as He instructs us in our daily lives. This instruction births wisdom.


Proverbs 13


How will you walk in wisdom today?

❤️

Ways of Wisdom

  • Wisdom walks in prudence. Thinking thoughtfully through our daily lives.
  • Wisdom was used in the process of God creating the world. How beautiful would our personal lives be if we walked in wisdom as well?
  • Wisdom travels with riches and honor. They are a group of best friends. Attach yourself to wisdom and you will be attached to riches and honor too.
  • Listen to wisdom as it cry’s out at the gate (start) of your journey and wisdom will continue to speak and guide you, giving you life. Refuse it and death will come.

‭‭Proverbs‬ ‭8:1-36‬ ‭NIV
“Does not wisdom call out? Does not understanding raise her voice? At the highest point along the way, where the paths meet, she takes her stand; beside the gate leading into the city, at the entrance, she cries aloud: “To you, O people, I call out; I raise my voice to all mankind. You who are simple, gain prudence; you who are foolish, set your hearts on it. Listen, for I have trustworthy things to say; I open my lips to speak what is right. My mouth speaks what is true, for my lips detest wickedness. All the words of my mouth are just; none of them is crooked or perverse. To the discerning all of them are right; they are upright to those who have found knowledge. Choose my instruction instead of silver, knowledge rather than choice gold, for wisdom is more precious than rubies, and nothing you desire can compare with her. “I, wisdom, dwell together with prudence; I possess knowledge and discretion. To fear the Lord is to hate evil; I hate pride and arrogance, evil behavior and perverse speech. Counsel and sound judgment are mine; I have insight, I have power. By me kings reign and rulers issue decrees that are just; by me princes govern, and nobles—all who rule on earth. I love those who love me, and those who seek me find me. With me are riches and honor, enduring wealth and prosperity. My fruit is better than fine gold; what I yield surpasses choice silver. I walk in the way of righteousness, along the paths of justice, bestowing a rich inheritance on those who love me and making their treasuries full. “The Lord brought me forth as the first of his works,, before his deeds of old; I was formed long ages ago, at the very beginning, when the world came to be. When there were no watery depths, I was given birth, when there were no springs overflowing with water; before the mountains were settled in place, before the hills, I was given birth, before he made the world or its fields or any of the dust of the earth. I was there when he set the heavens in place, when he marked out the horizon on the face of the deep, when he established the clouds above and fixed securely the fountains of the deep, when he gave the sea its boundary so the waters would not overstep his command, and when he marked out the foundations of the earth. Then I was constantly at his side. I was filled with delight day after day, rejoicing always in his presence, rejoicing in his whole world and delighting in mankind. “Now then, my children, listen to me; blessed are those who keep my ways. Listen to my instruction and be wise; do not disregard it. Blessed are those who listen to me, watching daily at my doors, waiting at my doorway. For those who find me find life and receive favor from the Lord. But those who fail to find me harm themselves; all who hate me love death.””
‬‬

Ways of Wisdom

  • Wisdom walks in prudence. Thinking thoughtfully through our daily lives.
  • Wisdom was used in the process of God creating the world. How beautiful would our personal lives be if we walked in wisdom as well?
  • Wisdom travels with riches and honor. They are a group of best friends. Attach yourself to wisdom and you will be attached to riches and honor too.
  • Listen to wisdom as it cry’s out at the gate (start) of your journey and wisdom will continue to speak and guide you, giving you life. Refuse it and death will come.

‭‭Proverbs‬ ‭8:1-36‬ ‭NIV
“Does not wisdom call out? Does not understanding raise her voice? At the highest point along the way, where the paths meet, she takes her stand; beside the gate leading into the city, at the entrance, she cries aloud: “To you, O people, I call out; I raise my voice to all mankind. You who are simple, gain prudence; you who are foolish, set your hearts on it. Listen, for I have trustworthy things to say; I open my lips to speak what is right. My mouth speaks what is true, for my lips detest wickedness. All the words of my mouth are just; none of them is crooked or perverse. To the discerning all of them are right; they are upright to those who have found knowledge. Choose my instruction instead of silver, knowledge rather than choice gold, for wisdom is more precious than rubies, and nothing you desire can compare with her. “I, wisdom, dwell together with prudence; I possess knowledge and discretion. To fear the Lord is to hate evil; I hate pride and arrogance, evil behavior and perverse speech. Counsel and sound judgment are mine; I have insight, I have power. By me kings reign and rulers issue decrees that are just; by me princes govern, and nobles—all who rule on earth. I love those who love me, and those who seek me find me. With me are riches and honor, enduring wealth and prosperity. My fruit is better than fine gold; what I yield surpasses choice silver. I walk in the way of righteousness, along the paths of justice, bestowing a rich inheritance on those who love me and making their treasuries full. “The Lord brought me forth as the first of his works,, before his deeds of old; I was formed long ages ago, at the very beginning, when the world came to be. When there were no watery depths, I was given birth, when there were no springs overflowing with water; before the mountains were settled in place, before the hills, I was given birth, before he made the world or its fields or any of the dust of the earth. I was there when he set the heavens in place, when he marked out the horizon on the face of the deep, when he established the clouds above and fixed securely the fountains of the deep, when he gave the sea its boundary so the waters would not overstep his command, and when he marked out the foundations of the earth. Then I was constantly at his side. I was filled with delight day after day, rejoicing always in his presence, rejoicing in his whole world and delighting in mankind. “Now then, my children, listen to me; blessed are those who keep my ways. Listen to my instruction and be wise; do not disregard it. Blessed are those who listen to me, watching daily at my doors, waiting at my doorway. For those who find me find life and receive favor from the Lord. But those who fail to find me harm themselves; all who hate me love death.””
‬‬

So…you got this one, eh?

Why do we choose to take matters into our own hands? Why do we say, “Take a coffee break, Jesus. I have this one under control.” We forcefully take whatever we placed in His hands back. We send Him to our other issue(s) and keep this particular one because we feel we can handle it, it’s not that serious to give to God, or we are tired of waiting on God to work and think we can make things happen faster.

Let’s think for a moment. In life, we all have tried to fix one thing or another. When we did, we failed. Or we temporarily fixed the issue with our solution. I remember getting having an issue with my radiator in my car. It had a leak which caused my fluid to leak. Fixing it was about $350. I didn’t have that at the time. So I spoke to some people and they recommended putting an adhesive fluid in my radiator that will flow through and attach itself to the issue. If this worked, the leak would be fixed. But only for a moment. It would just buy me time until I replaced the radiator. But if I chose this route, the fluid of course doesn’t just stay in radiator, but the fluid will flow through the system. Now I would risk clogging up other parts of my car because of my quick and easy patch work.

Can you see where this is going? Taking the situation from God to fix it yourself will cause other areas in your life to be affected. Not only is your faith in God now rocky, but your trust is shaky. Your determination is now depleting. Your destiny has now taken a back seat to your now. We take our eyes off of the bigger picture to “fix” our now. By patching up our now, we hinder the blessing from flowing to our future.

The Bible says, “to acknowledge Me in all of your ways and I will direct your path. “It also reads, “cast all your cast into me.” The keys Word in both these verses is all. Not some. Not only the “big” things. Not just things that seem out of your reach. But ALL. Why does He want all of your ways and cares? Because His thoughts and ways are so much higher than ours could even be. His wisdom is too great. If we need to have surgery, we go to the hospital and lay down on the bed so the doctor can work on our bodies. But first they put us to sleep. Imagine taking the scalpel from the doctor while saying “I got this”. No you don’t have this. You will bleed to death if you make the wrong incision. Because you have no idea what you’re doing. The doctor has the schooling and knowledge to know that where they need to cut here. I need to do xyandz to fix this problem and make this person healthier.

So I say all of this to say, let God reign freely in your life. He has everything under control. Trusting Him is the best thing you can do in your life. He is God. A God that is able to do above all you can ask or think.

This Thing Called Religion 

The only life that I want to live is a life that’s pleasing to Christ.One filled with malice, maliousiness, twofaceness, and hate just isn’t right. The life that I live on social media must match my reality. That’s important to me. Some say, Jess you take this thing to seriously. No, I act like this “thing” is important to me. I rather be known as the prayerful, loving, Jesus giving girl. Then the one that cursed someone without a care. Maybe if enough of us took this “thing” a little more seriously, the hurt and lost would be more willing to listen. But right now, all they see is the church being the world’s equal. Instead of the church without a spot or a wrinkle.
Give Jesus. The people need Him.