Can you hear Me now?

It was 2011. I was cruising through life. Caught up in doing things my way knowing good and well I was going against God. But I was ok with this. Why? Because my God is soooo gracious. Yupp, I was doing my thing and didn’t care. I had SOME nerve!! 

So one night around 10 pm, I was chilling. The room completely dark. The room was quiet. I was alone. So I thought. All of a sudden, I  heard “don’t take advantage of My grace.” I jumped up and looked around the room. I got up and turned the light on. Looked around some more. Now, I did all of this knowing that I wasn’t going to find anyone in the room but me. I knew it was God. I sat on the bed. Thought about what I heard and immediately repented.

This would be first of many times I heard Him.

Now, I wish I could say that I got my act together right then and there. I wish I could say I became this great Christian… nope! (But thats another blog for another day)

After the moment I just told you about, years passed before I heard the voice of the Lord again. Sure, I knew His hand was on my life. Yes, I would see signs of Him being present. But He wasn’t speaking. Or was He? It wasn’t until I joined my church on a months fast in January 2016 that I began to recognize His voice. As I was fasting and praying (because they go hand in hand) I would take a moment to stop and listen. The more I tried to hear, the more I heard. Now during this time of fasting, I needed to make a decision in life and needed to know if this was Him or not. At times, I would think I heard Him , then would brush it off. Like naaaa, that was just me talking. This happened a lot during that month. Then one day I was sitting in the living and I said something (I can’t remember what) , but His response was “I’ve been speaking all along.” My mouth dropped. Clarity. This is all I wanted. To hear and recognize my Lords voice. This was a humbling experience. I wanted to cry and smile at the same time. Who was I that He would decide to visit me, sit with me, and talk. I was grateful. 

As I grew, I looked back on the event. I realized that I made myself available. I sought after and found Him. I called and He answered. As I quieted the noise around me, the volume of His increased. 

When was the first time you heard God speak? When was the last time You heard Him? Have you ever heard Him? How do you know when He is speaking?


You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart.
Jeremiah 29:13 NIV

Come near to God and he will come near to you. Wash your hands, you sinners, and purify your hearts, you double-minded.
James 4:8 NIV

But the Advocate, the Holy Spirit, whom the Father will send in my name, will teach you all things and will remind you of everything I have said to you.
John 14:26 NIV

Whoever has ears, let them hear what the Spirit says to the churches.”
Revelation 3:22 NIV

The Lord said, “Go out and stand on the mountain in the presence of the Lord , for the Lord is about to pass by.” Then a great and powerful wind tore the mountains apart and shattered the rocks before the Lord , but the Lord was not in the wind. After the wind there was an earthquake, but the Lord was not in the earthquake. After the earthquake came a fire, but the Lord was not in the fire. And after the fire came a gentle whisper.

1 Kings 19:11‭-‬12 NIV

Behind the camera.

Want to know a secret? I go through the same process everytime it’s time for me to photograph.

I book a photo session months in advance.
I am fine. No biggie.
The week of, I’m fine. No biggie.
The day of…yup you guessed it. Perfectly fine.

But the hour of the session, I get nervous.
I pray.
I quote scripture.
I breathe.

Then…I arrive at the location.

All of the nervousness ceases and I go into “I can do all things through Christ” mode. It’s like my superpowers are released. I’m in a totally different zone.

I pose. I shoot. I laugh. I cry. I encourage.

Then its all over…done.

I look at the images thankfully because Jesus trusted me with this amazing gift. Because He talked me through it. Because without Him, I suck. I am glad I still get nervous. Because in that nervousness, I pull on Him even more.

I would like to share with you guys a few images of a wedding that were taken on 6/10/2016. Enjoy.

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Wheres my cape?!

Want to know a secret? I go through the same process everytime it’s time for me to photograph.

I book a photo session months in advance.
I am fine. No biggie.
The week of, I’m fine. No biggie.
The day of…yup you guessed it. Perfectly fine.

But the hour of the session, I get nervous.
I pray.
I quote scripture.
I breathe.

Then…I arrive at the location.

All of the nervousness ceases and I go into “I can do all things through Christ” mode. It’s like my superpowers are released. I’m in a totally different zone.

I pose. I shoot. I laugh. I cry. I encourage.

Then its all over…done.

I look at the images thankfully because Jesus trusted me with this amazing gift. Because He talked me through it. Because without Him, I suck. I am glad I still get nervous. Because in that nervousness, I pull on Him even more.

I would like to share with you guys a few images of a wedding that were taken on 6/10/2016. Enjoy.

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I see you

You are not alone.

jessicacarollynblog

I see you
I see the smile you wear to cover up the pain
Maybe if you smile hard enough no one will know you are going insane
You’re physically and mentally tired of putting on a front
When will someone hear you screaming “help”
I see you
You’re hurt, frustrated, and depressed
But you can’t even talk to anyone because you’re afraid of them finding out you’re a mess…inside
I see you
So you silently drown in your sorrow
Suffocating
Grasping for air
I see you
You decide enough is enough
I’m ready to exit this life
I can’t take another day of pretending and living a lie
How about I overdose on meds and just die
I see you
Life isnt worth living
It’s a constant struggle
No one understands
Man, where is this bottle?!
I see you
But before you pop that top to the bottle
Let…

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Over it (I’m done)

Don’t give up.

Unless of course you’re giving up:
Frowning, stress, pain, hurt, doubt, fear, poverty, hatred, malice, gossiping, suicidal thoughts, unforgiving heart, etc.

Feel free to toss your hands up and say “I’m done” #LifeIsSoMuchBetterOnTheOtherSideOfTheseThings #ChristDiedSoWedBeFreeFromSin #Smile #GodLovesYou

Conversations with God

I was asked to do something tonight and debated doing it. I just want to share how the conversation with God transpired

Me: Hmm…should I go?

Him: Go.

Me: Me not being there wont stop the show. *turns right to go home*

Him: you’re being disobedient.

Me: *sigh* ok Lord. *turns car around*

Him: you’re on assignment. You need to be there.

Me: *picks mouth up off the floor* Lord, I don’t know what to do or say. I need your help. Guide me.

Him: I will. But you’re going to have to listen.

Me: *chuckles* listen OK…OK…

Let us not just hear Him when He speaks, but listen and obey.

#LessonLearned

Amen (It is so)

Lord, I intercede even now for those who are imprisoned by mental bars. We know that the enemy’s job is to steal, kill, and destroy, but you have given us power over the enemy. You have given us the victory. You have given us the power to speak to our mountain and it has to move. Your word says that whatever we bind on earth shall be bound in heaven and whatever we loose on earth will be loosed in heaven. So we bind the hand of the enemy right now. No weapon formed against us shall prosper. For we are more than conquers. I bind mental illness, for you have given us a sound mind. The spirit of depression, because your joy is our strength. The feeling of not being enough, for You thought we were to die (on the cross) for. The feeling of loneliness, for You will never leave us nor forsake us. The feeling of not being loved, for you are love. When we found You, we found love. I loose your peace that will flow like a river. Joy that is our strength. Laughter that does good like medicine. Your love that will find us even in the darkest moment. You’re our strength when we are weak. Help us Lord to live our life according to Your Word so that we will walk in our purpose, for Your glory. Lord, I pray for their complete freedom. In Jesus name. Amen.

I love You, I’m just not that into You.

I find myself talking to my friends more than I talk to you.

I find myself entertaining others more than I pray.

I long for your presence but am busy to call upon Your name.

Praying before I leave the house in the morn? Sorry, no time because I overslept. Is it okay to pray on the go? We can have intimate time during my 10 minute drive to work. Don’t worry, i’ll lower the radio for a moment.

The best way to get to know someone is to spend time with them, but my time is too precious for You.

Yes, I binge watched a full 5 seasons this weekend and felt it was ok to say a quick thank You before I went to sleep.

I decided to take matters into my own hands, because my will is more important than Yours.

We can try Your way after we try my way.

I read the verse of the day in my bible app while at a red light.

What my friends are tweeting and posting is so much more interesting.

Hold on wait, my favorite YouTube couple just posted their latest vlog.

Ok, let me settle down and focus on You.

ZZZZzzzZzZZzZZZZZzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

I’ll do better tomorrow…

 

Ladies and gentleman, let us not take advantage of Gods grace.

 

To Be Continued….

Drop your limits here

We can talk ourselves out of just about anything. We can list a million reasons why we can’t or why we haven’t. We can talk ourselves right out of a blessing.

I don’t have the money.
I don’t have the time.
No one wants to listen to me.
That’s already been done.
My kids are my main focus.
School is a heavy load right now.
I’m too old.
I’m not smart enough.
My dad was a nothing, so I’m a nothing.

Blah. Blah. Blah.

Now, think about it. What if you actually tried? What if you actually faced your fear? What if you just did IT? Whats the worse that could happen….you actually succeed?! Geeze. Success??  I’ll take it! There’s nothing to it but to it.

Let me say this, there have been times when fear literally stopped me in my track. I would get myself hype and say “today is the day”. Then when it was time to do xy and z, I failed. I would be so disappointed in myself because I would put off and put off. Then one day I finally did what I was afraid of doing. Come to find out, it wasn’t scary at all. Once I started, everything flowed. Why? Because everything that I need is in me. I have what it takes to get the job done. And you know what?? YOU DO TOO!!!!

So what limits are you putting on yourself? Please drop them here…

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No longer will you hold yourself back. No longer will you doubt your abilities. No longer will you speak or think negatively. No longer will you limit yourself. You are what you think. Think greatness. Speak greatness. Go and be great!

Suggested Reads…

I can do all this through him who gives me strength.
Philippians 4:13 NIV

No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. Romans 8:37

He must become greater; I must become less. John 3:30 NIV

You, dear children, are from God and have overcome them, because the one who is in you is greater than the one who is in the world.
1 John 4:4 NIV

Be free

Last night I went to prayer/bible study with a heavy heart.  My heart was hurting and I needed God to rid me of the pain.  I was determined to go into prayer to leave this at His feet.  I just knew that I was going to cry out to God on my behalf, but as I started to pray, I started to intercede for those that caused me this pain.  I began to lift them up and found that the more I cried out for them, the lighter I felt.  By the end of prayer, the hurt that I was carrying around was no longer there.

I am free!! 

Suggested reads:

After Job had prayed for his friends, the LORD restored his fortunes and gave him twice as much as he had before. Job 42:10

But I say to you, love your enemies, bless those who curse you, do good to those who hate you, and pray for those who spitefully use you and persecute you. Matthew 5:44

Bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you. Luke 6:28

 


If you’re reading this and you don’t know Jesus as your personal Lord and Savior, there’s no better time like the present to invite Him into your heart and life. If you’d like to do this now, genuinely and sincerely pray this prayer…

Lord Jesus,
I truly believe that You are the Son of God. I confess that I have sinned against You and cannot save myself. Please forgive my wrongdoing and let me live in a relationship with You from now on. I receive You as my personal Savior and believe that You have died for my sins, was resurrected from the dead and are alive and can hear my prayers. I invite You to rule in my life and in my heart from this day forward. Help me to live a life that is pleasing to You. Thank You for saving me.
In Jesus’ name,
Amen.